It is a well known fact that 95% of the time, if I leave the office with Shaynea, I'm going to get hit on by someone in the fast food industry. Seriously. I'm running out of places that I can eat. Just now, we went to Subway so she could pick up a little sammy, and right before we walked in, I was hit by one of those random gigantic drops of ick from who knows where. I just know it felt like it soaked my entire head, so I was bitching about it. Loudly. She ordered her food, and then I was just standing behind her because I already ate lunch and just went along for the walk. Guy #1 asked if I wanted anything, and I said no. Then guy #2 starts asking me if I'm sure, and telling me they have chips, sandwiches and cookies. Like I'm unfamiliar with the options, and that's what might be slowing me down. So I just tell him that I already ate, and try to catch Shaynea's eye like, WTF? Finally, #2 is all, want a free cookie? And you know me, I can't ever turn down a free cookie, so I take him up on it, then #1 starts trying to take credit for it. Then we're finally up to the point where we pay, and cash register dude (#3) is all, "Say, what did you ladies get for Valentine's Day?" and I very cleverly say, "Um, a cookie from that guy." So then #3 says, "Well, let me get that sandwich and chips, too." So, they're all flirting with me (I'm not just saying that, seriously. Shaynea will back me up on this.) but SHAYNEA gets a free lunch? Then they throw in a free cookie for her, too? Seriously, sometimes I think she's just trying to help herself out. She also gets much better service at the Billy Goat if I go with her, AND extra hash browns. I'm starting to wonder if she's spreading rumors about me being into dirty things for free food. Don't even talk to me about Taco Fresco and the bank.
Also, #2 told me that he'd take me to dinner if I let him, and I said something very cute like, "Mumble mumble mumble look away..."
So Happy VD everyone!
In the spirit of the day, I'm doing a little matchmaking for the kiddies: I fully believe that this kid should marry Natty G. When she's a rapper, of course. (Watch the whole video, he totally breaks it down somewhere near the 2:00 mark.)
PS- I do not tell this story to brag about my hotness (or lackthereof.) I am telling this story to prove the point that I attract all kinds, but ONLY when I'm with Shaynea. Blame it on Shaynea. (Yeah, yeah)