An overdue rant

Due to my return to work, I find myself struggling to find funny stories to post here. (But for the record, my classroom is FABULOUS and people have been coming in to hang out because it's awesome and I love it and I swear that after my meltdown on Tuesday, I'm not even stressed. And I got to meet a few of my kids, and they are so cute I can barely stand it. For real.)

So, I'm going to take the time to write out a rant about something that has been bugging the shit out of me all summer. What is that, you ask?

It's this stupid Katy Perry song- I Kissed a Girl. First of all, when people started talking about it, I thought they were talking about the Jill Sobule song of the same name. I think this song came out circa 96/97, so I was confused about the hype. But Jill Sobule kissed a girl because she was so excited about coming out with the fact that she was into chicks. Yay for you Jill! Katy Perry did it just to be an attention seeking whore. Seriously. She used to be a Christian singer, and now she's a sad one hit wonder because she's pretending to be controversial. YAWN. Sure, the tune is catchy and it gets stuck in my head, but I still hate it. It's annoying and such an obvious plea for negative attention that it makes me nuts. So if it's not too late, I would like to encourage a boycott of this crap. Stop giving her attention, you're only encouraging negative behaviors.

To get those songs out of your head, I'll give you another song from a long time ago- Stupid Girl by Garbage. Because Katy Perry is a stupid girl, and because I just saw Shirley Manson in a preview for that Terminator tv show and I think that's weird. I hope she didn't ditch out on my Madison boys for that. But if I could sing like Shirley Manson, you'd probably never be able to get me to shut up.

I FORGOT!

I forgot to tell you guys I bought a fish! He's a betta, and I named him Bubbles the Betta Fish and took him to school where the kids will love him. Cross it off the list.

Workin' Girl

I'm officially working again. I'm tired. No kids until Tuesday. I have zero witty anecdotes, but feel bad for abandoning the blog. I even ditched GT tonight because I had too much to do and two long days ahead of me that will include meeting parents. GT was very understanding...and since I called him, now he has my digits. So every cloud has a silver lining, right?

Song of the day: Supermodel (You Better Work) by RuPaul. Because it was stuck in my head all day today.

Since this is pretty weak, I'll also give you something else to watch, something topical: Schoolhouse Rock- Nouns! I'm all language arts on your ass.

Old friends

I just got home from seeing (drinking with) some old friends from college. Apparently we're all old, because we're telling stories from the old days and realizing that they happened 10 years ago. But even though I can go forever without seeing them, they are still people that I genuinely enjoy and appreciate. Even though they're all married and doing shit like having babies while I'm living my extended adolescence of eating peanut butter and calling it dinner and choosing not to work for the sport of it. Sometimes I feel like I'm being left behind, and sometimes I just think I'm in my own orbit. Either way, I always like discovering that whatever drew me to being friends with someone a million years ago can still exist beyond everything else, and that my fundamental belief that people don't really change (in the good ways) is true. So I'm a little sentimental and boozy right now. I'm mostly talking directly to all of you who read this, so there it is.

Song of the day is for Jay, again. (Sorry, Mary.) Summer of '69 by Bryan Adams.

"Well, that's over."

A few nights ago, I was sitting around watching some Olympics with my roomie, and we were talking about someone we hadn't met and she decided to look them up on the interwebs. (You know, places that rhyme with "Spacebook" and "Pieface".) And as we perused this person's life, it occurred to us to see if GT was into either of these things. Turns out that he is...but I couldn't see his profile. Only the part where I saw that he is only 25. I told the roomie, and she said, "Well, that's over."

I keep thinking that if he was 33, the four years wouldn't seem like that big of a deal. But I just keep thinking that we weren't even in high school at the same time, so he wouldn't get any of my pop culture references. So when I'm all, "Yeah, this song reminds me of the summer of '99, when I was drunk all the time..." he'd be all like, "Yeah...that's when I got my driver's license." It appears the roomie may have been correct.

So I went over there tonight for my lesson feeling pretty much over it, and I swear to you he LOOKED younger. I don't know if my eyes were playing tricks on me or what, but it was bizarre.

But I'm totally killing the song of the day in my lessons- I'll play it on request. Two by Ryan Adams. I'm going with the Letterman video because it's good to see him out of his scary hair and beard thing. The suit is a little weird, though. (See scary beard face here. And know that somehow, I couldn't just post only one Ryan Adams song.)

Applications for my new crush are available here.

List check = Life check

I was just looking at this list of things I have created for myself for my year of being 29 and...I really don't think I'm going to be able to cross all of these things off. But I can if I cheat. For example, I was going to train for a half marathon this summer, but just didn't feel like it. And not training was kind of fabulous. But I did do one back in '04, so can I cross it off the list? Or, I should have been more specific about dating someone I wouldn't normally date. Could TR 2.0 count, because I wouldn't normally go on a date while I was on vacation? The condo thing is a whole mess of other factors to consider so it may or may not happen. The weight loss is in progress, but not as quickly as I'd like. The nude modeling is definitely not going to happen without that. Still working on the blind date. Learning to snowboard and making it to Europe before my b-day? Probably not going to work out. The fish will happen in the next few weeks. The bridesmaid dress thing will be later- I'm thinking of having a fancy party either for the holidays or as a housewarming if I buy a condo. Or should I just donate them?

I guess since it is my list, and my plan to do all of these things, the decision is mine, right? If I cheat, does anyone really care? Will anyone be upset with me? Doubtful.

Work starts up again officially next week, even though I'm planning on spending a lot of time there this week, too...and then my summer of freedom is over. And I will be free again next summer, but I'm having trouble reminding myself that when school starts, while I will be busier, I still won't be as crazy busy as I was before. Life can have more than two speeds- I don't have to be running around 15 hours a day or not doing anything. There is a happy medium there, I just haven't seen it in awhile and I don't entirely remember how to do it. I'm sure I'll figure it out just fine, but it will be weird. People keep giving me the big "boo-hoo" when I complain about going back to work, and I get it. But it's scary and life changing and scary. I just need to be nervous to light that fire in myself to go out and do it. Once I'm in it, it will be fine, but until then, I'll sit around being nervous. Very productive.

I keep thinking about the summer I moved from Missouri to the Chicago 'burbs. We moved in June or July, but in August I went back for a visit. I remember floating around in the pool with Kristin listening to REM singing "Nightswimming" on repeat all night and thinking about the line "September's coming soon..." because I was scared of starting school then, too. Because I was a junior in high school and didn't know yet about the amazing people I was going to meet and the great things I'd get to do. If I look at it that way, I actually have a leg up. I already know a lot of people there. Twenty-nine is a long way from sixteen, and I'm much more clear on who I am and I'm working on figuring out what I want from my life. Now that I've made some real progress on the career front, I have a few more things to figure out.

This post just changed considerably as I was writing it from what I had originally intended it to be. I think I'll leave it, because it's like journaling, but a lot less private. That's the tricky thing about these interwebs, no such thing as privacy. But when I put it out there, it makes things seem a little less... lonely isn't the word. Just less like I'm on this crazy trip on my own, because I get to take you with me. I get why people can be so personal in this format, but I also get why it is important to censor yourself now and again.

Anyway, I'm getting older and still having adventures and wasn't that kind of the point of the list?

Today's obvious song of the day: Nightswimming by REM. Hope the rambling is at least coherent.

Lack of endurance

You guys? I'm exhausted. Because I woke up at 7 and went to school and went through boxes and pretended to push furniture around for...oh, I don't know, maybe 2 hours? ish?

I'm such a wimp! All this laying around and doing nothing with my time has worn me down so that I can't seem to do anything. I'm babysitting an infant later, and I'm seriously considering a nap.

But if I don't, you know what I'll do tonight? Sleep. All Night Long. (That's your song of the day, by Jay's request...I spend like 3 or 4 whole minutes coming up with a blog tie-in to that song. I work hard to entertain you guys.) (Also, when it's stuck in your head all day, blame him.)

Have great weekends! I'm headed for the homeland for a wedding shower. Basically, I'm going to eat like it's my last meal because my aunts are all phenomenal cooks, and I'm out of money so it's all ramen and frozen veggies up in here.

Oh Olympics

This is the third night in a row you have kept me up because I can't go to bed until I know for sure if any of these people got medals. Jonathan Horton is so adorable I want to throw him in my bike basket and take him out for ice cream. Seriously.

I hope that once gymnastics ends, I'll be able to settle down. But it is fascinating to see the things these people can DO. I can do a headstand if I'm propped up against a wall. The end.

Fake out song of the day- A clip from the movie "Stick It". I would LOVE to see someone pull this kind of stunt at the Olympics. Fast forward to the 3 minute marker to get to the good stuff.

Cheese curds

I woke up today in a funk for no apparent reason. After laying around doing nothing all morning, I forced myself to head down to the farmer's market in Lincoln Park.

Actual conversation that I had there:

"Hey, do you have cheese curds?"

"Yep, I just made them yesterday so they're extra squeaky...Are you from Wisconsin?"

"Obviously."

Mmmm, squeaky cheese and a bike ride by the lake. I feel better now.

Song of the day: Small Town by John Mellencamp. I will always be a small town/city girl hybrid.

Success!

There are many ways to define success in this lifetime, along with many aspects of our lives where we can achieve it.

Today, I define my summer as a success because I just got to see my sister and she said, "I don't think I've ever seen you that tan. Or with a tan at all, really."

BECAUSE I NO LONGER WORK IN A BASEMENT, BITCHES!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh man, it was the best thing ever. No matter what, after this summer? I win.

(Anxiety about the first day of school is coming. Shut the fuck up with all the "Back to School" shit Office Depot. No one is talking to you.)

Song of the day: Pocket Full of Sunshine by Natasha Bedingfield.

Recession

First, before I get all serious, if you want other nostalgia from my college years, see Jay's blog about High Life. It cracked me up. But only go look if you've got a lot of time for the You Tube-ing. (Tubing?)

Onto some social commentary. Or at least something resembling it.

I keep hearing all of this talk about whether or not we are in a recession, and all this talk of people cutting corners and losing their homes, and to be honest, it sort of goes right over my head. As someone who has been "voluntarily" unemployed since March, believe you me, I know a thing or two about cutting corners. But it felt like it was just me cutting back until recently. Not in a self-centered way, but knowing that I had to cut corners made sense and I didn't really feel like I saw it happening around me. I was walking down one of the big streets in my neighborhood, and I counted 4 cute little boutique-y stores with "Store Closing" signs in the window. Then today, I heard that a very good friend of mine was laid off by a company that I used to work for. I have mixed emotions about the company, but I was always happy that they seemed to be good to her. And she seems fine, but I am pissed on her behalf. She's very "Everything happens for a reason" but I am totally sending some evil eye in their direction.

I don't know. Just everyone out there? Try to put a little money away for a rainy day, but I'll keep hoping for sunny skies over you.

Song of the day: Money, Money, Money by ABBA/Meryl Streep in Mamma Mia. (PS- go see this movie. It just makes me happy.)

Enunciation

It's a beautiful evening here in Chicago, so I'm sitting here with all of my doors and windows open. I can always hear crowd noise when the Cubs are playing, but a few minutes ago, I could actually understand that they were chanting "Cardinals Suck". So I went to check, and they are, in fact, playing the Cardinals. That is bizarre.

In honor of that, it's a Song of the day double play- two different songs called Stutter! Because I can't decide which one makes me happier- the Elastica song or the Joe song (f/Mystikal.) One is very high school, the other is college, and I just can't make the call. One is edgy, the other makes me think I should head over to 201 and see if I can snag a free beer, and since it's Sunday night, maybe try to make it in time for some POS voting. Ah, the old days...

PS- Trel, you totally need to have guest bloggers tell their favorite POS stories and just tell your folks not to read your blog for a few days.

This could be trouble.

I've been home watching approximately 15 mins. of the Opening Ceremonies for the Olympics, and I've already heard a story that made me tear up a little. Seriously Olympic commentators? You have to hit me in the heart strings that soon? You're going to show me an adorable 9-year-old who saved his classmates after an earthquake and expect me to keep it together? Seriously, Yao Ming, how are you not just totally tempted to eat that kid's face? He's so cute.

You may be asking too much.

Go Team USA.

But the song of the day is directly to you, Mr. Commentators. (And it's a quick shout out to Jenn- I hope no one will play any games with your heart, either. Fingers and toes crossed, perhaps even a prayer or two.) Quit Playing Games by the Backstreet Boys! Lackey, I think you'll like this one, too.

Dirty girl

Dear Guitar Teacher,

Oh, GT. If you want me in your room, you don't have to make up a silly story about your power being out except for the one outlet that just happens to be in your bedroom. Seriously. I'll go willingly.

XOXO,

Rachel

(I am a huge dork. And this is sort of pathetic, but it's totally cracking me up and I haven't had a crush in a very long time. So it's fun.)

Song of the day: Banana Pancakes by Jack Johnson. Because it's the song GT decided to teach me last night. He totally wants to make me banana pancakes. (Let me check- yep, I'm still a loser.)

Ka-BOOM!

There are very few things in which I can definitively say that I am not a big sissy. But thunderstorms are one of them. When it starts storming, I get so excited and happy and sitting staring out my window at the sky going apeshit totally makes my day. I love all of the energy in the air, I get a little nutty. Plus, I read somewhere once a long time ago something about reasons why tornadoes rarely hit urban areas, so I have nothing to worry about. But last night, they actually called out my neighborhood and told us to go to the basement, and that threw me. And it was one of those things where I wasn't sure what to do- I don't have a radio anymore, there was no way I could keep track of what was happening because our windows in the pseudo-basement face the wrong way so I wouldn't know what was up. So I was standing in the back stairway and I actually saw the rain twirling. The rain was coming down in circles over the stadium lights at Wrigley. It was bizarre. Even weirder because I'd woken up yesterday morning having dreams about tornadoes hitting the city. Long story short? I'm scary psychic, but fine. And that was one freaky ass storm.

My roommies are both gone for the rest of the week, so this is today's dance around your apt. in your underwear song of the day: D.A.N.C.E by Justice. Do the dance!

Happy Birthday, Timmy!

Awwww, what's that you ask? I mean, it's awfully cute, right? It's like I sent you a little ray of sunshine for your birthday. I'm the nicest girl ever.

Or not. Anyone else remember what I gave Tim for his birthday last year? Yeah, that's right. I dropped some syph on his ass. Recently, he was mad at me for something, and when he mentioned that to a coworker they said, "Why, did she give you herpes again?" And first, I was all, "Yo, give syph the respect he deserves, don't go just assuming that all STD's are the same." Anyway, it was convenient timing because I was reminded that his birthday was coming up, so of course I go check the best gift giving website ever, and guess what! They DO have herpes, and I'm nothing if not a sucker for tradition. So order some herpes I did. (Then sent it to Timmy and being nice enough to hyphenate his new last name...because he hasn't bothered to do that yet.) I told my sister to keep her eye out for it, and she was like, "This joke will never stop being funny."

Apparently, the herp got out of the bag last night because I got a text that said, "I'm glad Sarah thinks herpes is cute since I will have him forever!" Hee hee. Tim has herpes. I'm the best sister-in-law in the WORLD.

No givebacks.

Timmy's b-day song of the day? Catch My Disease by Ben Lee.

Drunk chicks

Remember how I was all sad because I gave up all of my classic drunken texts? And I asked you guys to help me out?

Well, let me tell you something- you have been USELESS as far as that is concerned. Seriously, it's like you all got old and stopped being ridiculous. So being the leader that I am, on Friday, I took matters into my own hands and tried a new Mexican place with Skylar because we heard that the margaritas were phenomenal.

They are. After 2 of them, it was approximately 8:30 and we were bombed but it was OBVIOUSLY too early to go home so we left and went to another bar. Since I was helping Tim celebrate his birthday, I was texting him all night to let him know how the Chicago celebration was going, and good news! My new phone has a sent folder for text messages so that I can look back and see exactly how much of an asshole I really am.

We were at the 2nd bar, having a few beers (duh) and we started talking to some Canadian dudes who were sitting behind us. I was arguing for way too long about whether the word sombrero means hat in Spanish, and we went so far as to ask the busboy to help us settle the bet. (I won, but seriously? Racist! Who actually drags the busboy into the discussion?) Then we went inside- something about noise laws, and Skylar went to pee. At one point Canadian #1 was all, "Um, do you think you should check on your friend?" And I'm like, "Nah, she's good. I'm not worried about her at all, I'm sure she's fine." About 30 seconds later our waitress comes over and says, "Hey, your friend is stumbling around in the bathroom you should probably check on her." So I crack up and head down, and yeah....she is in bad shape. So I hold her hair for a minute, then put some paper towels on her face and go back upstairs to pay our tab. But I insisted on finishing my beer first. (Again, who DOES that?) So then I dragged Sky home and dropped her in my bed with some water, and slept on the couch. That's sort of weird, normally I'd just crawl in with her, but my spidey senses must have been tingling because in the morning she came out with all of my sheets in her arms and said, "Me and your sheets are going to take a little shower." Because she puked. In my bed.

She felt horrible, but I couldn't stop laughing. The poor kid was sick for most of the day yesterday.

I had a text from Tim when I woke up that said, "I just forwarded that to your sister." and I thought, "Oh shit, what was the last thing I sent?" It was:

"Give in to the roofies. You'll like it, I promise. Sky is passed out in my bed."

Seriously, it sounds like I'm simultaneously trying to molest Tim AND that I already did violate Skylar. Ew. What is wrong with me? In my defense, I was not the one who mentioned roofies first, but come ON.

So yeah...I'm off the sauce for at least the next few days. How were your weekends?

Song of the day: The Garden by Mirah. I'm obsessed with this song...after seeing it on So You Think You Can Dance with my roommate. But that doesn't mean it's not an awesome song. Just that it's sad that I now get my hip music choices from an obnoxious reality show.

Still HOT

It's still hot. I'm over it.

Today is Timmy's birthday, and I have a long thing half written in honor of that, but I'm not sure if he's gotten his gift yet, and I'm not going to go ruining it here. As soon as I know, you guys will laugh.

Mostly, I just wanted to post the song of the day.

HOT HOT HOT by Buster Poindexter. (I'm hot! You're hot!)

Oh, and to say that the movie Blaire and I saw yesterday was Mamma Mia, and we sang ABBA songs the entire ride to the lake. It was hilarious.